Why are men happier?

gameboy

Why are men happier?

Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
You can never be pregnant.
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
You can wear NO shirt to a water park.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding dress £1000. Morning suit rental £60.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks.
A five-day holiday requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is £2.95 for a three-pack.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You almost never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original color.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
Your belly usually hides your big hips.
One wallet and one pair of shoes one colour for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a moustache.
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

Only he who does nothing, does nothing wrong.

rolfw

Nice one GB.

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dig deep

So true

BarMoo

I couldn't resist a different spin on this.

Your last name stays put.
The garage is spotless.
Wedding plans take care of themselves; if you hire my partner?
Chocolate is grated onto a Latté.
You can never be pregnant - but you can get something else for life (least there are tablets)
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
You can wear NO shirt to a water park.
You normally only ever wear a white T-shirt. Period.
Car mechanics looks great as they pull-out from under a car.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. WTF? Next.
Same work, more pay. Great ain't it, LOL.
Wrinkles are a disaster.
Wedding dress £1000. Morning suit rental £60. Barbra Streisand Outfit - priceless.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them. No we don't [clue: its lower down].
The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected. Ah, but from which end?
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. Don't you just love Prada.
One mood all the time. Yeh, when the partner is visiting folks.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. That's a typo: he meant 300,000 mins.
You know stuff about tanks. Huh?
A five-day holiday requires only one suitcase. Another typo: he meant 10.
You can open all your own jars. That's what comes with working-out 6 times a week at the gym.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. Is that all, LOL ;-)
If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend. No, this is not true.
Your underwear is £2.95 for a three-pack. Typo city - that's 29.50 for one! If you please.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. Only a whore would own more. Unless you you have a sneaker fetish.
You almost never have strap problems in public. Sports Supporters? Do they count?
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Absolutely, someone else does that for me.
Everything on your face stays its original color. Yep, tanned.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. Skinhead.
You only have to shave your face and neck. Unless its another fetish.
You can play with toys all your life. Oh, yeh! too effing right ;-)
Your belly usually hides your big hips. Not a bear - next Q.
One wallet and one pair of shoes one colour for all seasons. We did this Q. Ans. 1 Blk & 1Brwn.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. As long as they waxed.
You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife. Is that a Q or a statement?
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a moustache. In some quarters it is obligatory.
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes. Personally, I am on-board with that one! .

.

Have Fun, Moo.