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A Few Short Ones
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<blockquote data-quote="Poison" data-source="post: 516809" data-attributes="member: 212708"><p><strong>What men do after s_x?</strong></p><p></p><ul> <li data-xf-list-type="ul">2% eat</li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul">3% smoke cigarettes</li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul">4% take a shower</li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul">5% go to sleep &</li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul">86% get up and go back home to their wives.</li> </ul><p></p><p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p><p></p><p><strong>Why is your penis better than a credit card? </strong></p><p></p><ul> <li data-xf-list-type="ul">Once spent it recharges itself.</li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul">It is accepted worldwide.</li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul">You can let your wife use it as much as she wants.</li> </ul><p></p><p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p><p></p><p>LITTLE GIRL.......Mommy, I just found out that our neighbour's son has a penis like a peanut!!</p><p>MoM.........You mean it's small?</p><p>LITTLE GIRL....No it's salty!!!</p><p></p><p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p><p></p><p><strong>A couple recently married was happy with the whole thing.</strong> </p><p></p><p>He was happy with the hole, and she was happy with the thing.</p><p></p><p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p><p></p><p><strong>A man was carrying 3 babies in a train.</strong></p><p></p><p>The lady sitting next to him asked: Are they your babies?</p><p></p><p>MAN: No, I work in a condom factory and these are customer COMPLAINTS..</p><p></p><p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p><p></p><p><strong>Women top 5 lies.</strong></p><p></p><p>From The Whitest Down</p><p></p><p>5. I am a virgin.</p><p>4. It is so big. </p><p>3. I can't do that to my best friend.</p><p>2. I won't gain weight after marriage.</p><p>1. I am coming! I am coming!!!</p><p></p><p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p><p></p><p><strong>A guy goes up to a girl in a bar and says: You want to play magic. </strong></p><p></p><p>She says: What is that? </p><p></p><p>He says: We go Home, screw, and then you disappear.</p><p></p><p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong>What is the closest thing to a woman's period?</strong></p><p></p><p>Your SALARY... It comes once a month, lasts 4 or 5 days, and if it doesn't come, you are FU(KED!!!</p><p></p><p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong>Teacher Asked.........</strong></p><p></p><p>Which part of the body goes to heaven first?</p><p></p><p>A Kid replied : The legs...because every night I see my mom's legs up high and screaming 'OH GOD! I'M COMING'.</p><p></p><p></p><p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p><p></p><p><strong>Teacher: Why did you bring your cat to school?</strong></p><p></p><p>Pupil : Because I heard my sister's boyfriend say, "TONIGHT I WILL EAT YOUR P*SSY".</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Poison, post: 516809, member: 212708"] [B]What men do after s_x?[/B] [LIST] [*]2% eat [*]3% smoke cigarettes [*]4% take a shower [*]5% go to sleep & [*]86% get up and go back home to their wives. [/LIST] ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ [B]Why is your penis better than a credit card? [/B] [LIST] [*]Once spent it recharges itself. [*]It is accepted worldwide. [*]You can let your wife use it as much as she wants. [/LIST] ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ LITTLE GIRL.......Mommy, I just found out that our neighbour's son has a penis like a peanut!! MoM.........You mean it's small? LITTLE GIRL....No it's salty!!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ [B]A couple recently married was happy with the whole thing.[/B] He was happy with the hole, and she was happy with the thing. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ [B]A man was carrying 3 babies in a train.[/B] The lady sitting next to him asked: Are they your babies? MAN: No, I work in a condom factory and these are customer COMPLAINTS.. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ [B]Women top 5 lies.[/B] From The Whitest Down 5. I am a virgin. 4. It is so big. 3. I can't do that to my best friend. 2. I won't gain weight after marriage. 1. I am coming! I am coming!!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ [B]A guy goes up to a girl in a bar and says: You want to play magic. [/B] She says: What is that? He says: We go Home, screw, and then you disappear. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ [B] What is the closest thing to a woman's period?[/B] Your SALARY... It comes once a month, lasts 4 or 5 days, and if it doesn't come, you are FU(KED!!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ [B] Teacher Asked.........[/B] Which part of the body goes to heaven first? A Kid replied : The legs...because every night I see my mom's legs up high and screaming 'OH GOD! I'M COMING'. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ [B]Teacher: Why did you bring your cat to school?[/B] Pupil : Because I heard my sister's boyfriend say, "TONIGHT I WILL EAT YOUR P*SSY". [/QUOTE]
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