Log in
Register
Menu
Log in
Register
Home
What's new
Latest activity
Authors
Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
Latest activity
Members
Current visitors
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
General Topics
Members Lounge
Wavey's Jokes Corner (May contain nuts)
Pretty Smart
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Topper" data-source="post: 364700" data-attributes="member: 186250"><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. </span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing.</span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.</span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">FOR EXAMPLE:</span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, </span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">"I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me." I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!"</span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear... </span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">"You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."</span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"</span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep. </span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. </span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. </span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. </span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all.</span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for each outfit."</span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">We went on to the jewellery department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited.</span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck.</span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.</span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">I think I confused her when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.</span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier."</span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."</span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, </span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">"WHAT?" I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while.</span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."</span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added,</span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">"Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"</span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">Apparently I'm not having s_x tonight either....but at least that bitch knows I'm smarter than her.</span></span></span></span></span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Topper, post: 364700, member: 186250"] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT='Comic Sans MS']I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. [/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][/COLOR][/COLOR] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT='Comic Sans MS']And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][/COLOR][/COLOR] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT='Comic Sans MS']FOR EXAMPLE: One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, [/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][/COLOR][/COLOR] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT='Comic Sans MS']"I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me." I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!" So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear... [/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][/COLOR][/COLOR] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT='Comic Sans MS']"You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?" Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep. [/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][/COLOR][/COLOR] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT='Comic Sans MS']The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. [/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][/COLOR][/COLOR] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT='Comic Sans MS']We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. [/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][/COLOR][/COLOR] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT='Comic Sans MS']I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. [/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][/COLOR][/COLOR] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT='Comic Sans MS']She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for each outfit." We went on to the jewellery department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I confused her when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier." I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it." Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, [/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][/COLOR][/COLOR] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT='Comic Sans MS']"WHAT?" I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added,[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][/COLOR][/COLOR] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT='Comic Sans MS']"Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?" Apparently I'm not having s_x tonight either....but at least that bitch knows I'm smarter than her.[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][/COLOR][/COLOR] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial] [/FONT][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
General Topics
Members Lounge
Wavey's Jokes Corner (May contain nuts)
Pretty Smart
This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
Accept
Learn more…
Top