Why did the chicken cross the road?

T_G

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OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a CHANGE! The chicken wanted CHANGE!

JOHN MC CAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.

HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure right from Day One! -- that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me.......

DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on 'THIS' side of the road before it goes after the problem on the 'OTHER SIDE' of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his 'CURRENT' problems before adding 'NEW' problems.

OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road...

ANDERSON COOPER - CNN: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's GUILTY! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain. Alone.

JERRY FALWELL: Because the chicken was mature content! Can't you people see the plain truth?' That's why they call it the 'other side.' Yes, my friends, that chicken is mature content. And if you eat that chicken, you will become mature content too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media white washes with seemingly harmless phrases like 'the other side. That chicken should not be crossing the road. It's as plain and as simple as that.

GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be able to let the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting and went on to accomplish a life long dream of crossing the road.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together in peace.

BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2007, which will not only cross roads but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your check book. Internet Explorer is an integral part of "Chicken". This is a new platform much more stable and will never
cra...#@&&^(C% - - - reboot

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

BILL CLINTON: I dd not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is your definition of chicken?

AL GORE: I invented the chicken

COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?

DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun?

AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.

RolfW: I only believe it crossed the road If I see it through a flying pigs eye
 

HB13DISH

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T_G: Because it didn't read the Idiot Guide for Chickens.

 

T_G

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HB13DISH said:
T_G: Because it didn't read the Idiot Guide for Chickens.

Damn right!! :-rofl2


There are four main dialects of Chicken.
  • Chicken Standard
  • Poultrish
  • Fowlese
  • French
  • many indigenous chickens speak in their own tribal dialects
In case someone wants to continue (click here for the full article)
"The language of Chicken is generally spoken by chickens. It has dated back to 5678 BC and is one of the oldest still spoken languages today. The language of Chicken consists of four main sounds: pok, brawk,cluck and meow.
The alphabet of the language of chicken is very advanced where it was 7000 years in the making until now. It can be learned easily with a bit of practice and can be used in everyday life.
  • A= pok pok
  • B= cluck pok
  • C= cluck cluck pok
  • D= cluck cluck cluck
  • E= pok cluck brawk
  • F= brawk brawk
  • G= cluck pok brawk
  • H= pok pok pok
  • I= cluck brawk
 

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HB13DISH

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Sorry to inform you that the chicken is
cluck cluck cluck pok cluck brawk pok pok cluck cluck cluck
 

Topper

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HB13DISH said:
Sorry to inform you that the chicken is
cluck cluck cluck pok cluck brawk pok pok cluck cluck cluck

You lot need your bumps feeling, has it been too warm for you today :)
 

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As Foghorn may have once said,"are you,I say are you taking the p*ss boy?"
 

Yorks

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No I think that you are getting your Foghorn confused with your Fred Elliot.

A say... I think you're getting............ oh never mind :)
 

snaffles

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Q.
Why did the chicken cross the road & come back again,
cross the road & come back again,
cross the road & come back again,
cross the road & come back again,
and cross the road & come back again?


A.
His braces were caught on the lamp-post.


[ Hey, don't blame me - I didn't start it. ]
 

dig deep

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American politics in a "nut"shell:-rofl2
 

tsts

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Simon Cowell: The truth is this chicken cannot cross. It’s a no for me.

Moh’d Al Fayed: Chicken crossed the road and crashed the car. They were bred by MI6

Gordon Brown: The chicken did not cross the road. Tories and LibDems prevented them from crossing the road and voting for Labour. Hence we lost the elections.

Tony Blair: Chicken crossed the road to become a catholic.
 

T_G

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Darth Vader: Aaaaahhhhhh it wanted ahhhhhh to come to ahhhhhhhhh the dark side ahhhhhhhh of the road

Obi Van: Bollox say you stuck arse in my Chicken is ouch
 
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