Woof

PaulR

Dazed and Confused Admin
Staff member
Joined
Jun 28, 2003
Messages
18,024
Reaction score
4,046
Points
113
My Satellite Setup
-----------See sig-----------
My Location
Wirral, NW UK and Vaucluse, France.
I'm at pet shop buying a bag of dog food for my dog.

While in the queue, a woman behind me asked if I had a dog. Now, why else would I be buying dog food?

So, being top notch with the banter, I told her "No, I don't have a dog, I'm starting my Dog Food Diet again" and that I probably really shouldn't because the last time, I had ended up in hospital, in intensive care with IVs in both arms and tubes coming out of most orifices. But, looking at it positively, I had lost three stone in four weeks!

I told her that it was essentially the Perfect Diet and all you have to do is load your pockets with handfuls of dry dog food and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. I get the 'Complete' food as it is nutritionally balanced, so it works really well, and I decided that I was going to give it another go.

Horrified, she asked if I had ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me.

"No," I told her "I stepped off a curb to sniff a Cocker Spaniel's arse and a lorry hit me.
 
Top