Log in
Register
Menu
Log in
Register
Home
What's new
Latest activity
Authors
Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
Latest activity
Members
Current visitors
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
General Topics
Members Lounge
Wavey's Jokes Corner (May contain nuts)
A blonde goes to Heaven
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Crisbe" data-source="post: 635117" data-attributes="member: 327196"><p>A blonde was sent on her way to Heaven. Upon arrival at the Pearly Gates, Saint Peter met her and informed her that Heaven was suffering an overload of goodly souls and that they had been forced to instigate an entrance exam, to ease the burden of Heavenly arrivals.</p><p></p><p>"that's cool" said the blonde, "What does the entrance exam consist of?"</p><p></p><p>"Just three questions" said St Peter.</p><p></p><p>"Which are?" asked the blonde.</p><p></p><p>" The first" said St Peter, "is which two days of the week begin with the letter T? </p><p>The second is how many seconds are there in a year? </p><p>The third is what is the name of the swagman in Waltzing Matilda?"</p><p></p><p>"Now," said St Peter, " Go away and think about those questions and when I call upon you I shall expect you to have those answers for me."</p><p></p><p>So the blonde went awat and gave those three questions some considerable thought (Iexpect you to do the same before reading further)</p><p></p><p>The following morning, St Peter called upon the blonde and asked if she had considered the questions, to which she replied "I have".</p><p></p><p>"Well then" said St Peter, "which two days of the week start with the letter T?"</p><p></p><p>The blonde said "Today and Tomorrow"</p><p></p><p>st Peter pondered this answer for sime time and decided that indeed the answer can be applied to the question.</p><p></p><p>"Well then, could I have your answer to the second question?" St Peter said, "How many seconds are there in a year?"</p><p></p><p>The blonde replied "Twelve".</p><p></p><p>"Only twelve?" exclaimed St Peter, " How did you arrive at that figure?"</p><p></p><p>" Easy" said the blonde "there's the second of January, the second of February, the second of March right through to the second of December, giving twelve seconds in total!"</p><p></p><p>St Peter looked at the blonde and said "I need some time to consider your answer before I can give you a decision." and he walked away shaking his head.</p><p></p><p>A short time later he returned and said to the blonde, " I will allow the answer to stand, but you need to get the third and final question absolutely correct to be allowed in to heaven. Now can you tell me the name of the swagman in Waltzing Matilda?"</p><p></p><p>The blonde replied, " Of the three questions, I found this one the easiest to answer!"</p><p></p><p>"really!" exclaimed St Peter, "and what is the answer?"</p><p></p><p>"It's Andy!"</p><p></p><p>"Andy???"</p><p></p><p>"Yes it's Andy," said the blonde.</p><p></p><p>This totally floored St Peter, and he paced this way and that, deliberating the answer. Finally, he could not stand the suspense any longer, and , turning to the blonde asked " How in the name of God did you arrive at THAT answer?"</p><p></p><p></p><p>v</p><p></p><p></p><p>v</p><p></p><p></p><p>v</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>"Easy" said the blonde, "Andy sat, Andy watched, Andy waited till his billy boiled."</p><p></p><p>And the blonde was allowed to enter heaven!</p><p></p><p>WHAT'S WORSE, I BET YOU ARE NOW SINGING IT TO YOURSELF!!!!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Crisbe, post: 635117, member: 327196"] A blonde was sent on her way to Heaven. Upon arrival at the Pearly Gates, Saint Peter met her and informed her that Heaven was suffering an overload of goodly souls and that they had been forced to instigate an entrance exam, to ease the burden of Heavenly arrivals. "that's cool" said the blonde, "What does the entrance exam consist of?" "Just three questions" said St Peter. "Which are?" asked the blonde. " The first" said St Peter, "is which two days of the week begin with the letter T? The second is how many seconds are there in a year? The third is what is the name of the swagman in Waltzing Matilda?" "Now," said St Peter, " Go away and think about those questions and when I call upon you I shall expect you to have those answers for me." So the blonde went awat and gave those three questions some considerable thought (Iexpect you to do the same before reading further) The following morning, St Peter called upon the blonde and asked if she had considered the questions, to which she replied "I have". "Well then" said St Peter, "which two days of the week start with the letter T?" The blonde said "Today and Tomorrow" st Peter pondered this answer for sime time and decided that indeed the answer can be applied to the question. "Well then, could I have your answer to the second question?" St Peter said, "How many seconds are there in a year?" The blonde replied "Twelve". "Only twelve?" exclaimed St Peter, " How did you arrive at that figure?" " Easy" said the blonde "there's the second of January, the second of February, the second of March right through to the second of December, giving twelve seconds in total!" St Peter looked at the blonde and said "I need some time to consider your answer before I can give you a decision." and he walked away shaking his head. A short time later he returned and said to the blonde, " I will allow the answer to stand, but you need to get the third and final question absolutely correct to be allowed in to heaven. Now can you tell me the name of the swagman in Waltzing Matilda?" The blonde replied, " Of the three questions, I found this one the easiest to answer!" "really!" exclaimed St Peter, "and what is the answer?" "It's Andy!" "Andy???" "Yes it's Andy," said the blonde. This totally floored St Peter, and he paced this way and that, deliberating the answer. Finally, he could not stand the suspense any longer, and , turning to the blonde asked " How in the name of God did you arrive at THAT answer?" v v v "Easy" said the blonde, "Andy sat, Andy watched, Andy waited till his billy boiled." And the blonde was allowed to enter heaven! WHAT'S WORSE, I BET YOU ARE NOW SINGING IT TO YOURSELF!!!! [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
General Topics
Members Lounge
Wavey's Jokes Corner (May contain nuts)
A blonde goes to Heaven
This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
Accept
Learn more…
Top