hoggy
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Its been around B4, but still funny...
TEST FOR DEMENTIA...
Exercise of the brain is as important as exercise of the muscles. As we
grow older, it's important that we keep mentally alert. The saying; "If you
don't use it, you will lose it," also applies to the brain, so..... Below is a
very private way to gauge your loss or non-loss of intelligence. Take
the following test and determine if you are losing it or are still "with
it."
OK, relax, clear your mind and.... begin.
1. What do you put in a toaster?
Answer: "bread." If you said "toast," then give up now and go do
something else. Try not to hurt yourself. If you said, "bread," go to
Question 2.
2. Say "silk" five times. Now spell "silk." What do cows drink?
Answer: Cows drink water. If you said "milk," please do not attempt the
next question. Your brain is obviously over stressed and may even overheat.
It may be that you need to content yourself with reading something more
appropriate, such as Children's World."
If you said "water," proceed to question 3
3. If a red house is made from red bricks, and a blue house is made from
blue bricks, and a pink house is made from pink bricks and a black house
is made from black bricks, what is a greenhouse made from?
Answer: Greenhouses are made from glass. If you said, "green bricks,"
what the devil are you still doing reading these questions?????
If you said "glass," then go on to Question 4.
4. Twenty years ago, a plane was flying at 20,000 feet over Germany. If
you recall, Germany at the time was politically divided into West Germany
and East Ger many. Anyway, during the flight, TWO of the engines failed.
The pilot, realizing that the last remaining engine is also failing, decides
on a crash landing procedure. Unfortunately the third engine fails before
he has time to attempt an emergency landing, and the plane crashes smack
in the middle of "no man's land" between East Germany and West Germany.
Where would you bury the survivors? . . in East Germany or West Germany
or in "no man's land"?
Answer: You don't, of course, bury survivors. If you said ANYTHING else,
you are a real dunce and you must NEVER try to rescue anyone from a plane
crash.
Your efforts would not be appreciated.
If y ou said, "Don't bury the survivors," proceed to Question 5.
5. Without using a calculator -- You are driving a bus from London to
Milford Haven in Wales. In London, 17 people get on the bus. In Reading,
six people get off the bus, and nine people get on. In Swindon, two people
get off and four get on. In Cardiff, 11 people get off and 16 people get on.
In Swansea, three people get off and five people get on. In Carmathen, six
people get off and three get on. You then arrive at Milford Haven.
What was the name of the bus driver?
Answer: Oh, for crying out loud! Don't you remember?
It was YOU!!
TEST FOR DEMENTIA...
Exercise of the brain is as important as exercise of the muscles. As we
grow older, it's important that we keep mentally alert. The saying; "If you
don't use it, you will lose it," also applies to the brain, so..... Below is a
very private way to gauge your loss or non-loss of intelligence. Take
the following test and determine if you are losing it or are still "with
it."
OK, relax, clear your mind and.... begin.
1. What do you put in a toaster?
Answer: "bread." If you said "toast," then give up now and go do
something else. Try not to hurt yourself. If you said, "bread," go to
Question 2.
2. Say "silk" five times. Now spell "silk." What do cows drink?
Answer: Cows drink water. If you said "milk," please do not attempt the
next question. Your brain is obviously over stressed and may even overheat.
It may be that you need to content yourself with reading something more
appropriate, such as Children's World."
If you said "water," proceed to question 3
3. If a red house is made from red bricks, and a blue house is made from
blue bricks, and a pink house is made from pink bricks and a black house
is made from black bricks, what is a greenhouse made from?
Answer: Greenhouses are made from glass. If you said, "green bricks,"
what the devil are you still doing reading these questions?????
If you said "glass," then go on to Question 4.
4. Twenty years ago, a plane was flying at 20,000 feet over Germany. If
you recall, Germany at the time was politically divided into West Germany
and East Ger many. Anyway, during the flight, TWO of the engines failed.
The pilot, realizing that the last remaining engine is also failing, decides
on a crash landing procedure. Unfortunately the third engine fails before
he has time to attempt an emergency landing, and the plane crashes smack
in the middle of "no man's land" between East Germany and West Germany.
Where would you bury the survivors? . . in East Germany or West Germany
or in "no man's land"?
Answer: You don't, of course, bury survivors. If you said ANYTHING else,
you are a real dunce and you must NEVER try to rescue anyone from a plane
crash.
Your efforts would not be appreciated.
If y ou said, "Don't bury the survivors," proceed to Question 5.
5. Without using a calculator -- You are driving a bus from London to
Milford Haven in Wales. In London, 17 people get on the bus. In Reading,
six people get off the bus, and nine people get on. In Swindon, two people
get off and four get on. In Cardiff, 11 people get off and 16 people get on.
In Swansea, three people get off and five people get on. In Carmathen, six
people get off and three get on. You then arrive at Milford Haven.
What was the name of the bus driver?
Answer: Oh, for crying out loud! Don't you remember?
It was YOU!!