fun-ny ...

[sophia]

A man breaks into a house to look for money and guns.
Inside, he finds a young couple in bed. He orders the guy out of bed
and ties him to a chair. While tying the homeowner's wife to the
bed the convict gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up
and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband whispers
over to his wife: 'Listen, this guy is an escaped convict. Look at his clothes! He's probably spent a lot of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck. If he wants s_x, don't resist, don't complain..do whatever he tells you.
Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is
obviously very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us both. Be
strong, honey. 'I love you!'

His wife responds:
'He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me that he's mature content, thinks you're cute, and asked if we had any Vaseline. I
told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. 'I love you, too.'