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Wavey's Jokes Corner (May contain nuts)
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<blockquote data-quote="Topper" data-source="post: 814570" data-attributes="member: 186250"><p>In case you need further proof that the human race is doomed because of stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:</p><p></p><p>On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (darn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair).</p><p></p><p>On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special?)</p><p></p><p>On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how???...)</p><p></p><p>On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion).</p><p></p><p>On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!</p><p></p><p>On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought????..)</p><p></p><p>On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?)</p><p></p><p>On Boot's Children's Cough Medicine:"Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)</p><p></p><p>On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and...I'm taking this because???.....)</p><p></p><p>On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)</p><p></p><p>On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash!)</p><p></p><p>On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)</p><p></p><p>I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one: On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."</p><p></p><p>On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals." (..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Topper, post: 814570, member: 186250"] In case you need further proof that the human race is doomed because of stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods: On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (darn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair). On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special?) On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how???...) On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion). On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh)! On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought????..) On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?) On Boot's Children's Cough Medicine:"Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.) On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and...I'm taking this because???.....) On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.) On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash!) On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?) I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one: On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals." (..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?) [/QUOTE]
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