Peeing on my flowers

A little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic garbage bags behind her.
One of the bags was ripped and every once in a while a £5 note fell out onto the footpath.
Noticing this, a policeman stopped her, and said, "Ma'am, there are £5 notes falling out of that bag."
"Oh, really? Darn it!" said the little old lady. "I'd better go back and see if I can find them. Thanks for telling me, Officer."
"Well, now, not so fast," said the policeman.
"Where did you get all that money? You didn't steal it, did you?"
"Oh, no, no", said the old lady.
"You see, my back garden is right next to a golf course. A lot of golfers come and pee through a knot hole in my fence, right into my flower garden. It used to really tick me off. Kills the flowers, you know. Then I thought, 'why not make the best of it?' So, now, I stand behind the fence by the knot hole, real quiet, with my hedge clippers. Every time some guy sticks his thing through my fence, I surprise him, grab hold of it and say, 'O.K., buddy! Give me £5 or off it comes!'


"Well, in some ways that seems only fair, but I am not sure about the legality of what you are doing" said the policeman, laughing. "Anyhow, good luck! oh, by the way, what's in the other bag?"


"Not everybody pays."

I do not know why, but this reminded me another story:

An American tourist in Spain goes to a restaurant and notices another guy eating some weird thing. He calls the waiter and says, "Excuse me. Can I have that same dish, please?"

The waiter says, "No sir, You can't."

He asks, "Why not?"

Waiter: "Because, sir, they are the balls of a bull."

Man: "So what? I want them!"

Waiter: "No, sir. You don't understand. Here in Spain, bullfights occur, and the balls of the bull are chopped off and supplied to our restaurant, so we get only one pair of bull's balls a day. If you like, I'll reserve the next pair for you."

Man: "Okay, I'll come back tomorrow."

The next day, the man goes in and is served a pair of small balls. Outraged he asks, "What the hell is this! Yesterday's balls were much bigger!"

Waiter : You don't understand something, sir. Sometimes the bull wins."