do you speak english?

Zorba

Zorba

Regular Member
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3m(28.2E),1.5m(19.2E.13E,10E),1m (4W ,7W)1m (?).diseqc 10,sky plus,VU+,telergy iptv.
Satlook nit colour + Horizon hdsm.
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Limassol, Sunny Cyprus
#1
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of Europe, rather than German, which was the other possibilty. As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would be known as "EuroEnglish":

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favor of the "k". This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have one less letter. There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with " f ". This will make words like "fotograf" 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkorage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent "e"s in the language is disgraseful, and they should go away.

By the 4th yar, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with"z" and "w" with "y". During ze fifz year, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaing "ou" and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leteres. After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no more trubls or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech ozer.

ZE DREM VIL FINALI KUM TRU!!!!! (Und zen ve vil take over ze vorld!!!!!)

:-thumbup
 
dig deep

dig deep

Prince of Birthdays
Staff member
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Dream7020 and AZ Elite and a few DM800
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Sweden
#2
Hehehe about time they learn how to spell :-Cbigsmil
 
T

Tiggy

ASBO Club Member - Persona non grata
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#3
NICE ONE.

I vil be posting to a few friends.

Regards,
Tiggy.
:-googly :-sugar :-pachrist :-sball :-HoHo :-santa3 :-bigsanta :-csmile
 
rolfw

rolfw

Believe it when I see it Admin.
Staff member
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Technomate 5402 HD M2 Ci, DM7000s, Transparent 80cm Dish, Moteck SG2100 DiseqC motor, lots of legacy gear. Meters: Satlook Digital NIT, Promax HD Ranger+ spectrum analyser.
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Berkshire
#4
LOl, very good. :)
 
L

Likvid

ASBO Club Member - Persona non grata
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Stockholm, Sweden
#5
We will all be Russians one day speaking the same language.
 
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