Don't fart in bed

Zorba

aka Skyman
Messages
2,201
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7
My Satellite Setup
3m(28.2E),1.5m(19.2E.13E,10E),1m (4W ,7W)1m (?).diseqc 10,sky plus,VU+,telergy iptv.
Satlook nit colour + Horizon hdsm.
My Location
Limassol, Sunny Cyprus
#1
This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for years.
The only friction in there marriage was the husband's habit of farting
loudly every morning when he awoke. The noise would wake his wife and the smell would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air.
Every morning she would plead with him to stop ripping them off because it was making her sick. He told her he couldn't stop it and that it was perfectly natural.
She told him to see a doctor; she was concerned that one day he would blow his guts out. The years went by and he continued to rip them out!
Then one Thanksgiving morning as she was preparing the turkey for dinner and he was upstairs sound asleep, she looked at the bowl where she had put the turkey innards and neck, gizzard, liver and all the spare parts and a malicious thought came to her. She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband was sound asleep and, gently pulling back the bed covers, she pulled back the elastic waistband of his underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into his shorts.
Some time later she heard her husband waken with his usual trumpeting which was followed by a blood curdling scream and the sound of frantic footsteps as he ran into the bathroom. The wife could hardly control herself as she rolled on the floor laughing, tears in her eyes!
After years of torture she reckoned she had got him back pretty good.About twenty minutes later, her husband came downstairs in his
bloodstained underpants with a look of horror on his face. She bit her
lip as she asked him what was the matter He said," Honey, you were
right." "All these years you have warned me and I didn't listen to you."
"What do you mean?" asked his wife. "Well, you always told me that one day I would end up farting my guts out, and today it finally happened.But by the grace of God, some Vaseline, and two fingers, I think I got most of them back in."
 

wolfav

Regular Member
Messages
470
Likes
0
My Satellite Setup
two sky+amstrad boxes
technomate5500ci+ with 80cm motarised dish irderto cam mr mrev +dragoncam blue tit numerous fun cards infinity pheonix compaq and dell on wirelessrouter
My Location
no mans land
#2
nice one i could see the ending coming but it still give me a giggle
 

4dbennett

lifes not a practice run
Messages
362
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0
My Satellite Setup
SPIDERBOX 9000HD, 1.2 and Humax Foxsat HD,Hitachi L500HDD
Acer Aspire 5315 Lappy
My Location
torfaen south wales
#3
Absolutely brilliant, thank u m8

deep joy dave:) :)
 

Channel Hopper

Suffering fools, so you don't have to.
Staff member
Messages
24,759
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5,440
My Satellite Setup
A little less analogue, and a lot more crap.
My Location
UK South
#4
It is indeed unfortunate that the advert at the top of the page suggest you,

'Find girl fart mpeg, Buy girl fart mpeg on ebay'
 

pempeke

PRIMEIRO MINISTRO
Messages
204
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0
My Satellite Setup
mirage 900sci
a adubar tudo e + alguma coisa quando nao ha trancas na porta.para o resto, enigmas...
My Location
Buckingham Palace
#6
perfect to better a crapy day in the office. thanks
 
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