Terryl
Specialist Contributor
- Joined
- Apr 14, 2011
- Messages
- 3,288
- Reaction score
- 1,942
- Points
- 113
- Age
- 82
- My Satellite Setup
-
OpenBox X5 on a 1 meter motorized dish.
And now a 10 foot "C" band dish.
Custom built PC
- My Location
- Deep in the Boonies in the central Sierra Nevada mountains of California.
This from a friend at another site "Justdroppedin".
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Late for work................... A Man realizing the time, threw on some clothes and ran out the door as fast as he could. He hops in his car and speeds off, driving much faster than he should have been. During his ride, he goes beneath an overpass, where a police officer happened to be parked that day. Noticing the maniac speeding down the road,the police officer pulls out, sirens blazing. The man pulls over as soon as he notices.
The police officer walks up to the car and asks, "Sir, do you know how fast I just clocked you at?"
The man replied, "Probably too fast, officer. I'm sorry, I'm really late for work and I had an important client coming in for an appointment.."
The officer cuts him off, saying, "What is it exactly you do that warrants that kind of rush?"
The man replied, "Well sir, I'm an a$$hole stretcher."
"A what??"
"An a$$hole stretcher. People pay for my services in doing exactly that. Today we were going to go through the steps of my client's upcoming procedure."
"Why would he need that explained, though?"
"Well, it's a fairly long, strenuous, and complicated process, requiring thousands of dollars of expensive equipment and the knowledge of how to use all of it. This particular client was going to be my most challenging procedure yet, as he wanted me to stretch his a$$hole to around six feet!"
The officer seemed rather perplexed at this point. After a long, awkward silence, he asks, "But what the hell do you do with a six foot a$$hole?"
The man replied, "You give them radar guns and put them under bridges."
The police officer walks up to the car and asks, "Sir, do you know how fast I just clocked you at?"
The man replied, "Probably too fast, officer. I'm sorry, I'm really late for work and I had an important client coming in for an appointment.."
The officer cuts him off, saying, "What is it exactly you do that warrants that kind of rush?"
The man replied, "Well sir, I'm an a$$hole stretcher."
"A what??"
"An a$$hole stretcher. People pay for my services in doing exactly that. Today we were going to go through the steps of my client's upcoming procedure."
"Why would he need that explained, though?"
"Well, it's a fairly long, strenuous, and complicated process, requiring thousands of dollars of expensive equipment and the knowledge of how to use all of it. This particular client was going to be my most challenging procedure yet, as he wanted me to stretch his a$$hole to around six feet!"
The officer seemed rather perplexed at this point. After a long, awkward silence, he asks, "But what the hell do you do with a six foot a$$hole?"
The man replied, "You give them radar guns and put them under bridges."