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Wavey's Jokes Corner (May contain nuts)
salvation (slightly rude)
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<blockquote data-quote="T_G" data-source="post: 166787" data-attributes="member: 175083"><p style="text-align: left">It was time for Father John's Saturday evening bath</p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">and young sister Magdalene Edwards had prepared the</span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">bath water and towels just the way the old nun had instructed.</span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">Sister Magdalene was also instructed not to look at</span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">Father John's nakedness if she could help it, do whatever</span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">he told her to, and pray.</span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"></span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">The next morning the old nun asked Sister Magdalene</span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">how the Saturday night bath had gone. "Oh, sister,"</span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">said the young nun dreamily. "I've been saved."</span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"></span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"Saved? And how did that fine thing come about?" asked</span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">the old nun.</span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"></span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"Well, when Father John was soaking in the tub, he asked</span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">me to wash him, and while I was washing him he guided</span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">my hand down between his legs where he said the Lord</span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">keeps the Key to Heaven."</span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"></span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"Did he now," said the old nun evenly.</span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"></span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">Sister Magdalene continued, "And Father John said that</span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">if the Key to Heaven fit my lock, the portals of Heaven</span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">would be opened to me and I would be assured of salvation</span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">and eternal peace and then Father John guided his Key</span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">of Heaven into my lock."</span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"></span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"Is that a fact," said the old nun more evenly.</span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"></span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"At first it hurt terribly, but Father John said the</span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">pathway to salvation was often painful and that the</span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">glory of God would soon swell my heart with ecstasy.</span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">And it did, it felt so good being saved."</span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"></span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"That wicked old Devil," said the old nun. "He told</span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">me it was Gabriel's Horn, and I've been blowing it for</span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">40 years!"</span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="T_G, post: 166787, member: 175083"] [LEFT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][FONT=Arial][/FONT][/SIZE][/FONT]It was time for Father John's Saturday evening bath [FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][FONT=Arial]and young sister Magdalene Edwards had prepared the bath water and towels just the way the old nun had instructed. Sister Magdalene was also instructed not to look at Father John's nakedness if she could help it, do whatever he told her to, and pray. The next morning the old nun asked Sister Magdalene how the Saturday night bath had gone. "Oh, sister," said the young nun dreamily. "I've been saved." "Saved? And how did that fine thing come about?" asked the old nun. "Well, when Father John was soaking in the tub, he asked me to wash him, and while I was washing him he guided my hand down between his legs where he said the Lord keeps the Key to Heaven." "Did he now," said the old nun evenly. Sister Magdalene continued, "And Father John said that if the Key to Heaven fit my lock, the portals of Heaven would be opened to me and I would be assured of salvation and eternal peace and then Father John guided his Key of Heaven into my lock." "Is that a fact," said the old nun more evenly. "At first it hurt terribly, but Father John said the pathway to salvation was often painful and that the glory of God would soon swell my heart with ecstasy. And it did, it felt so good being saved." "That wicked old Devil," said the old nun. "He told me it was Gabriel's Horn, and I've been blowing it for 40 years!"[/FONT][/SIZE][/FONT] [/LEFT] [/QUOTE]
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